Free sex toys offered to women who arent getting enough sex because all the men are playing Diablo 3

A French online purveyor of adult rudery is using the recent launch of Diablo III to generate a bit of publicity for itself. The company, called Absoloo, is offering a free sex toy to any mademoiselle that posts a picture of herself holding a copy of Diablo III to Absoloo’s Facebook page.

The idea behind the campaign is that the release of Diablo III has had a negative impact on the sexual needs of women because gaming men are notoriously bad at having sex when they’re distracted by such compelling virtual activities as looting and levelling-up and so during this temporary dry patch women should use a rubberised mechanical phallus in order to satisfy libido expectations.

The campaign in no way relies on gender stereotyping.

Above: Diablo III (top) and a typical French woman

I was going to post some pictures of the women who have uploaded pictures of themselves to Absoloo’s Facebook page, but instead I decided to make a graph that illustrates the problem of the declining amount of sex women receive from men when Diablo III has been released. Here it is:

Above: This graph is meant as a visual joke and should not be used for scientific research purposes

As far as I can tell – and admittedly my understanding of the French language is tres petite – Absoloo is not running an equivalent promotion for any sex-starved monsieur who has cruelly lost his belle to the addictive clutches of Diablo III. But I suppose that’s because women don’t play games. Clearly they are all too busy having a wank.

Our Diablo III review is coming along nicely. If you can stop playing Diablo III long enough you should definitely read it and not have sex with your partner instead.

Also, our friends over at CVG have been playing through Diablo III and here’s 30 tips and tricks every Diablo 3 dungeon crawler should know

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